staying here, at least for now and another year, is the only way i can really be happy.

i'd have to sacrifice everything if i transferred. the difference of 24,000 is so much. times 3? i can go around the world 634 times with that, and it's true. you learn, regardless of where you are. it's what you make of it.

and i like my freedom. not having to have a job, living in an apartment, and having my own car. i'd have to give up everything. and not be able to skip overseas to see people. or things. or places. just because.

i can't make sense of giving all of that up, just to be in a city.

the trees are nice here. beautiful, in fact. and the thai restaurant opened across the street, steps away. and oh how i'd miss. certain people that make it all worthwhile.

i've looked into japan, scotland and spain. and if i pick a certain major, i can go abroad two years. if i make it work. for 8,000 a year, there's so much more i can make work. i'm just going to have to put more mileage on my car. visit those that i want to be closer to. write letters and live through phonecalls.

i have weighed it all out. and this just makes more sense.

i am figuring myself out. bit by bit.

prove me wrong.